Sometimes I feel like "okay" is the only emotion I'm ever gonna feel. I don't want to be sad so I just say I feel "okay," but when am I gonna actually be "happy?" It's not that my life sucks or anything (I guess, LOL) but things just aren't where they're supposed to be right now and it's been like that for years. I try not to let anything bother me so I just say I'm "okay." Maybe things are constantly bothering me so I just settle with "okay, this is how I've alway been and always felt so this must be how I'm supposed to feel." I just can't wait to live on my own and be in control of myself. I hate having to live under someone and have to do what they want, when they want, how they want. It's like I do everything to make everyone else happy and they constantly cause this stress in my life. I don't even know what I'm saying anymore, my head is killing me. I guess all I'm saying is I forgot what it feels like to be happy, right where I wanna be. I know I'll get that feeling soon enough. It's just not here right now for a lot of reasons. But it'll come back around. I knoow it.